6:00 a.m.

I awake to a loud irritating sound – beep, beep, beep.

I ask for the hundredth time why I torture myself with so little sleep…the answer comes instantly, because I am a stay-at-home mom and a romance writer.

When I decided to write this article, there could only be one title. Everyday in the life of a mother and a writer is an adventure. When you lead the double life, it makes it all the more enjoyable; every day I am filled with surprises, whether from my family or from my characters.

There are more mommy writers out there day after day. Taking care of their families and writing at the same time. Some with young ones, school aged, teenagers and even college aged kids that require daily care. I’ll bet half of you even have full or part time jobs pressing on your list of to dos.

I have been writing since before my children were born. When my eldest daughter, now eight, was born I had to start making accommodations to my writing schedule. In addition I was also working full time. I learned to type one handed, keep books by the nursing chair, and live off of caffeine.

When my second daughter was on the way, I decided it was time to stop working and concentrate solely on my careers as a mother and writer. She is now three years old, and I have another one on the way.  After several years of trial and error down, I really have a pattern that seems to work, and I wanted to share it with other writing mothers.

Try them out. Ultimately you will have to come up with your own schedule and patterns. Everyone has different things they have to do during the day. Hopefully these tested methods will help you or at least give you an idea for something that works better.

So let’s start at the beginning of my day. As you saw at the beginning of the article I wake up before the rest of the house. I don’t do this to work on my writing as many others do. I do it to get most, if not all, of my chores done and a shower before the other inhabitants of the house rise. Everyone’s got chores, and if you’ve got kids, double them….marker on the walls, toys dumped and hidden in odd places, juice spilled, last night’s spaghetti stuck to the ceiling, you get the picture. For me, I can’t sit down to write unless I know I can actually sit down to write. If there is twenty loads of laundry to get done, I have to put at least one load in.

Come 7:30 a.m., I’m getting the kids dressed and taking my older one to school. From there I head straight to the gym, drop off my littlest one at the gym daycare, and hit the floor. I workout every morning, it helps to get the creative juices flowing. Think of it as an hour of time to plan out scenes and character sketches. A lot of times I’ll take the latest RWR or Romantic Times, and read it while on the bike. Also I sit a lot of the day, snack a lot and the only way to not add on the pounds is by sticking to a strict exercise regimen.

I know for those of you that work, this may be hard. I used to work out after work. Remember working out doesn’t mean you have to go to the gym. It could be going for a run or walk in the neighborhood, if you have a dog he would surely enjoy it! Running around at the playground after you pick up your kids. Taking a family walk after dinner. Squeezing your rump while at the desk, and tightening your abs during the commute are also ways to tone!

After the gym, I spend a little one on one with my youngest. Puzzles, books, going to the park, playing outside or going to a local mom and me class, just spending time together is important. By the way, your local library may have a free class for kids. Mine does and I love it. We read books, sing songs, and she gets to play with other kids. Plus it’s never too early to get your kids addicted to the library.

By 10:30 a.m., I get on the computer and check emails and look at my writing schedule for the day. These are easy things to do when you have a child running around, or a baby laying by you or on you. They don’t take as much concentration as writing a scene.

I know you’re thinking, a writing schedule? She’s crazy! I am totally serious. I am a strict adherer to a schedule. When you have so many things going on in your life, it is hard to just go with the flow. I have to at least have some basis to go off of or nothing will get done. That’s not to say that the schedule doesn’t change. Once things start adding up, you can’t do everything in one day. After all, even though everyone else thinks you’re SuperMom… the reality is even SuperMom can get stressed out!

What are some things I put on the schedule? Website updates, volunteer duties, articles, WIP’s to edit, review or write, emails, critiques, reading about craft, research, blogs, classes. I write it up at the beginning of each week with the goals I want to complete by the end of the week and then update it daily. My goal is to get it done Monday through Friday, leaving the weekends for catch-up, fun or getting ahead.

Just a side note on goals, it is important not only to set short term goals, but long term goals. I have my writing schedule on the computer. The first page is my short term goals for the week, and the second page is my long term goals. Long term goals for me are when I hope to finish a manuscript or article, and when to send in the query or submission package.

Let’s talk nap time. It is best to get the most writing done during nap time. This could be a good hour to three hours. Sit down and write. Push yourself. Just do it. Even if you think it’s crap and eventually you end up scrapping the whole thing. I find that every day, I write a little better and as long as I keep up with it, I’m good to go. I read somewhere recently that it only takes twenty-one days to form a habit. So get to it!

What if your baby or child won’t take a nap? Been there! Here are some things I do. I write in the play room, so they can play while I work. I set them at the table in the kitchen with me, each with paper and pen, and they can color or write their own stories. My oldest daughter loves to make her own books with papers she’s stapled together. My kids have V-tech laptops that they can play on, pretending to write like mommy does.

I will work in fifteen to thirty minute increments using a timer. After each increment I play with them for the same amount of time, then do it all over again. My kids love this game!

Projects, for older ones are great, and even little ones try to get involved. For a baby, hold them in your lap, typing with one hand is a lot easier than it sounds. Bouncy chairs and swings are great! Set the bouncy chair next to you. You can rock the baby with your foot or hand, and make cooing faces between paragraphs.

I also want to add in here, what do you tell your kids when they ask what you write? For my daughter telling her that I write stories about princesses and princes is enough, but for some of you, your kids may want to read your work. Do you let them? For me I think it will depend on the story. Some of the stuff I write is pretty steamy and I wouldn’t want my fourteen year old reading it. On the other hand a couple years down the road I might. I read my first romance when I was fourteen, and haven’t stopped since.

Afternoon, early evening has arrived, snack time, bus stops, homework and family time. Hopefully by now you’ve gotten most of your writing schedule for the day done, but we all know it doesn’t happen sometimes. Unless you’re on deadline for an editor, oh well. Family time is important. Remember that first and foremost you are a mother. Obviously if the kids are playing with dad, or with each other, then there is no problem to catch up on work. I check my emails, read books and magazines and sometimes write scenes while I’m making dinner. Last night I made two dinners, so tonight I can work later.

After bath time and bed time, I try to spend some time with my husband. About half the time he has work to do, or is still at work, so I utilize that time for writing or reading.

I am a late night person, up until midnight or later most days. It gives me a good four hours while the children sleep, to do whatever I need to do. Whether that be relaxing, spending time with my friends, hanging with the dear hubby, chores, writing, or watching television, I know that I can do it without having to change a diaper or make someone a snack.

A few extra pointers:

• Do keep notebooks everywhere! In your purse, nightstand, t.v. stand, bathroom, living room, kitchen, car. You never know when a clever plot, piece of dialogue or twist will come to you and you want to be able to write it down. There have been plenty of times I’ve forgotten a line that suddenly came to me and I wished I had written it down.

• Use a laptop. This makes life so much easier. You can take it from room to room, follow the kiddies. I’ve even put mine on the counter while cooking dinner.

• If you start habits/routines now, not only will they stick with you, but they stick with your family too. That doesn’t mean it always works. Just yesterday my older daughter came up to me and said “Mommy, I know you’re writing, but I think you need to take the day off.” ‘Nuff said boss, you got it.

• Don’t forget to call on help! Most likely your hubby knows you’re serious about a career in writing, although he may be jealous of the computer.  My husband has definitely joked that the other man is my laptop.  Ask him to take the kids to the park or read a book while you finish up a scene. Grandparents love to visit with the kiddies too. This will especially come in handy if you are on deadline for a publisher.

I hope that some of what you’ve read helps you. It can definitely be a hectic and trying time. Enjoy the ride while it lasts. At some point when you’re on your twenty-fifth best seller (wink*wink*) the kids will be at home with their own little chickadees. Playing monopoly, making cookies or going for a scooter ride will no longer be valid excuses for taking a break from your manuscript.

Being a writer you do have it nice. Your boss won’t break into your office and say, “Hey what are you doing on the floor with all these puzzles? You can’t bring your kids here!”

Just make sure to send in the submission package without the peanut butter smears…Well it’s been fun, but I have to go clean up the paper carpet my kids made in the living room, then right a steamy scene.

Ah, the adventure continues…

** This article was originally written in 2007, appearing in the Celtic Hearts Newsletter, and has been updated **