I have to start living my life this way.
I’m a beginner, and am only cultivating this approach now. I’m no expert. I’m a wanna-be. Aspiring Mindful Mommy.
In my scattershot attempts at being more calm and pleasant when sleep deprived, I have learned a few things. One is that 10 minutes matters.
If I throw myself into the activity, I can do anything for 10 minutes except hold my breath.
What are some things I have surprised myself by being able to do in 10 minutes, when I so didn’t feel like doing it?
- Write a great argument between my hero and heroine. It may have startling similarites to the argument I had with my husband the preceding night. That will be pure coincidence.
- Play Captain Hook for the 45th time. In a day. With a willing spirit.
- Play stay calm. ~ Say, then show, I’m sorry.
- Fold the socks. Just the socks. Lord, we have a lot of socks.
- Go out back and smell the air. Just close my eyes and smell and feel the air on my face and breathe. (Admittedly, this occurs when my son is in the bathroom. LOL If he saw me sitting still, doing nothing, that would obviously mean I needed a play partner and he’d come right over, affable fellow that he is.
)
Of course, if I want, in 10 minutes, I can also . . .
- Shout
- Say something I regret but can’t take back
- Hurt someone’s feelings
- Do something to a relationship will take months to repair
- Feel entitled
Hmmm . . . This part of the list could go on for awhile.
I have found my emotions to be contagious things. Actions, too.
Whatever I’m doing, I tend to do more of it. Whatever I’m feeling, I tend to feel more of it.
There’s a concept in physics that applies to our emotional lives as well . . . Inertia.
Things in motion tend to stay in motion, and things at rest tend to stay at rest, unless acted upon by another force. And those thing in motion? They tend to stay in motion, going the same direction. They have a trajectory.
Anger gets me more angry. Calmness gets me more calm. Unmotivated gets me more . . gack, unmotivated. Ack!
If I’m not FEELING it, I can usually DO it for at least 10 minutes, at the end of which I often AM feeling it. Or at least, more like it than I was 10 minutes ealrier.
Now, I’m not talking about ‘stuffing’ out feelings, or living a pretend life, where you act like everything is okay when it’s not. This is different. This is about throwing myself into a single moment with a willing spirit.
I just keep telling myself that, at the end of 10 minutes, I can unleash my righteous indignation & impatience on the world, and boy, will they be sorry then. See? I’m all grown up.
Write a scene, play spiderman, calm down, clean up, sniff the stars.
I can do anything for 10 minutes. I’ll be furious in 10 minutes, promise. Or . . . Maybe not.
How about you? What little rules or systems help you get by?
~Kris



I love your post, Kris! You are so right–you really can do so much in 10 minutes. I have an elliptical in my office. I can jump on that thing for 10 minutes at a time. Do I? HaHaHaHaHa! Oh, ahem. I mean, not lately.
My rules don’t mean squat in my house, so I won’t even bother posting them. If I’m nice to my 12 yr old, my 16 yr old, and DH, then they think it’s an open invitation to bug me when I’m writing. If I’m a complete raging bee-scratch, they leave me be. Do I regret yelling at them all the time? You bet. Do I end up yelling every time? You bet.
I need to take a page from you. Maybe I can learn to not yell–for at least 10 minutes.
Twitter: violaestrella
says:
Great post, Kris! Honestly, I waste more time thinking about doing something than actually doing it. Worrying about it. Wondering if I’ll ever have time to do it… Until I actually sit my butt down and do it. I love how you say 10 minutes and you ARE feeling it. So true! Love this advice.
Twitter: KrisKennedy
says:
Allie & Viola~
LOL. Yes, I totally hear you, Allie, on the not-getting-on-the-ellipitcal thing. I have a whole . . . OUTDOORS I’m not walking in. LOL
But I am *trying* to do more, rather than worry I can’t, or haven’t, or won’t. I SO hear you, Viola.
For me, so much of it is willingness. If I’m willing to feel different, this works. Some moment, tho, I find I’m more determined to be miserable. LOL
Kris
Twitter: jeannieruesch
says:
Hi Kris! Great topic and so true. Sometimes I find that ten minutes of sitting out on my front porch, in the cool (okay, cold lately rainy) air helps my stress levels go way down.
In the big scheme of things, ten minutes isn’t that long…but it can actually make the rest of the day more bearable at times.
Kris,
I too am amazed by what I can get done in just a few minutes! I’m also amazed that, when I look back on a day, if I’ve used my timer I feel like I’ve gotten a ton done…what’s that all about?
Short bits of time are not to be scoffed at – like you said they can be productive or not so much (like saying something you can’t take back…)
Great post!
Tiffany